we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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