Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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