Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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