we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
