Where are you?
In a non slutty way
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
