Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
