Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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