someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize