Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
