they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
