They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
