stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
