I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
