is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
