you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize