Those balls look pretty dangerous.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
