Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
