oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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