When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize