And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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