that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
