dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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