hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
