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Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
