She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Im part way to drunk.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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