I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
