i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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