My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize