One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
