only if we run a train.
done.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Randomize