think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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