I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
