I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
