she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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