If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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