were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
