return my video game
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
