Your mouth is God's brothel.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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