KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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