Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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