I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
