I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
