Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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