This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
