I wanna passion pit in your ass
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
