Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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