I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Even the bartender felt bad for me
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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