If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
