FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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