umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
