sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Sober January is a disaster.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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